I will be Bill Cosby into a microphone for up to 2 minutes of voiceover audio for $5

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It's me, Bill! Bill Cosby, comedy legend and Jell-O pusher, mystery solver and Darndest-Kids-Talker-To. And I've fallen on hard times. That's why I want to lend my unique and loverly pipes to you for five bucks. Shoot me a script up to two minutes in length and I'll cover it in my velvety tones. Any subject, any words, I don't give two flying floopity-joops. Order now!* *I'm not really Bill Cosby. But that's just between you and me.