I will record a Patrick Stewart monologue of your choice for $5

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For $5 dollars, I, Fake Patrick Stewart, will do a voice-over recording for you, saying anything you like. These can be up to a minute in length. Excellent for voicemails, pranks, what have you. If you're a Trek or X-Men nerd, I think you'll like this! Just send along the script with your order and I'll...make it so. Yeah, I said it.